Explaining ourselves: an Inane Social Need

Why do we feel the need to EXPLAIN OURSELVES, when clearly we have no true need to do so? How we RUN OUR OWN LIVES and pursue our OWN DREAMS, is no-one’s business but our own! It’s human nature, i suppose. An INANE SOCIAL NEED to be understood.. to be accepted. To be heard.

And so i write.

Man, believe me, it would be SO EASY to just stay here in my cozy house, with my fully-stocked STUDIO and entire room dedicated as a LIBRARY... in a city where buying any kind of FOOD i want, is cheap and available (i LOVE food!)... and with all my FAMILY AND FRIENDS that i love so much! Believe me, i am VERY THANKFUL for them all! Now THAT is a ‘rut’ that is SO easy and comfortable to stay in!

Instead, i plan on leaving all that comfort, to go to a place where it’s not uncommon for the weather to dip to -40C or lower, it’s dark most of the winter and there’s still snow on the ground in mid-June. Taking a few planes to get there, including ancient ones (OH how i hate flying). Where the grocery prices (well, ALL prices) are insanely expensive (a bottle of juice that costs $3 here, is $20 there).. i’m honestly worried if i’ll afford to be able to eat! I’ll be all by myself in an incredibly remote place where i know nobody, and i can’t come back on a whim (or for anything for that matter), because the cost would be astronomical! That basically means that once, i’m there, i’m there to stay until it’s over, however long that will take, because i won’t be able to afford to get back again! It’s an absolutely terrifying prospect!

Yet i feel the need to pull up my boot straps and do it anyway! As far as i’m concerned, STAYING in this cozy existence of mine IS the escape from reality and is the coward’s way out! There is NOTHING easy about moving to Iqaluit! No way, no how!  (WHY Iqaluit, is posted here)

I have Dreams. And sometimes those Dreams SCREAM in my ear to be heard! I can’t for the life of me, ignore them! And living in the ARCTIC is one of the loudest!

I’m in a position where the people i love are completely INDEPENDENT. They have their own lives and they live them as fully as they can or want to. I’m lucky enough to have enough REGULAR INCOME to be able to LIVE some of my own Dreams, and i’m not so stupid as to think that income will last forever! I have it NOW, and i need to USE it now, while i have it AND i have my health! *knock on wood* That’s not going to last forever either! In fact i’m kind of nervous that i’m losing that as we speak.

So now i have explained (to a degree). You either get it or you don’t. I know that my TRUE FRIENDS understand (or at least support) me. I appreciate them more than words can say.

I have always been a DREAMER and will be a Dreamer until the day i die! And hopefully, i will be able to realize as many of those Dreams as i can, before that day arrives!

(This is this post with its original template) --->